Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Commercials (Useless products)

So i was watching TV today, nothing interesting was on, but then again i was bored. A commercial came on, (I most often than not just completely ignore commercials, since they're so fucken stupid). It was about the new automatic soap dispense, you know the heat sensor one which you don't have to push a button so you can feel like you're at the mall while at home. Fuck OK, i get it, were lazy fucks, don't wanna press the button, or want use bar soap (because you know, that's for poor people) But what they used to advertise was just hilarious.  I'll dramatize is a little just for the lulz; "The button you use to dispense the soap is full of germs!! OH no, fucken germs!. You've got to buy this shit before you get swine flu or fucken aids!!! Have you touched things today? Because if you did, then your full of germs! When you press the goddamn button, they'll stay there and infect you're children, so here's a new and expensive solution to it! Buy our product or you'll die of harmless diseases which you would probably never catch!"  FFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUU i don't give a fucken shit if the button has germs I'm about to wash my shitcunt hands! Seriously commercials are just getting more and more retarded!  I guess its to best match the audience that's currently viewing.
   Meanwhile in the trailer park, at the cracker/cumdumpster's house. Yeah the one with all the acne and a bunch of marching band awards. She watches this commercial and fear strikes her heart; fear for her health and well being. She suddenly yells to her overweight mother in the kitchen, who is making a sandwich for her drunk father, who is bitching about how the immigrants took his job, a job he couldn't perform half as efficiently as an uneducated spic. "Mom! We has to get this new automatic soup dispenser, what if i touches a nigger at school and get home, push the button, put the aids germs on it, then wash my hands, we'll all get aids!! MOM! PLOAX! I CAN'T DIE A VIRGIN! (notice this girl is not a virgin, she's fucked more guys than Nina Hartley) And then Mom, "OK, honey, whatever you like sweetheart, babydoll!" And dad, "What the fuck are you talking about bitch! I ain't buying no shit even if it is so efficient at keeping us hard-working Americans germ free, and daughter, the fuck are you out of the kitchen bitch?" Fin.
   Did you read that? Did you picture it in your head? Well that's enough bullshit from me today, Back to where i belong....

22 comments:

  1. lol brother, nice blog commercials suck

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  2. lol, ya i hate commercials also ;x

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  3. i freaking hate commercials too.

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  4. lovin your blog, i love rants the best XD

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  5. I stoped watching TV because of stupid commercials !!! FFUUU !!

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  6. Apparently there was a recent law proposed to stop those commercials that are louder than the television shows they appear during.

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  7. i liked the rant, i'll be back :)

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  8. i fucking hate TV commercials! I pay for sky and the BB fucking cunting C and still have to suffer 5 mins of ad's every 15 mins grrrr

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  9. hey look at me ... I'm commenting on a blog ... woohoo

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  10. wow, there is nothing interesting on this page ;\

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  11. Wow, that's some rant. But I hate commercials that come up on youtube. Worse than TV commercials. And even worse: videos taht start playing on websites without my ok! Seriously, waht the fuck?

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